BeWell

TIME FOR AN EMOTIONAL DETOX?

You know it has never been more important to be resilient and look after yourself. But sometimes there just isn’t enough time for you, is there?

With the uncertainty that surrounds us, are you finding it difficult to sleep, as your mind is full of chatter, thoughts, and concerns?

Are you finding it difficult to make decisions as goalposts are constantly changing and you feel out of control?

Have you found that home working has blurred the already fragile line between work and home-life?

If you can answer yes to any of the above, this is the right blog for you.

I read once that your feelings come from your thoughts, which can be driven by other people’s opinions and beliefs as well as your own, so around and around the feelings go.

This month I want to share with you the success stories of two vastly different people who for quite different reasons experienced feelings that drove them to change their lives and a little insight from me to demonstrate that feelings are just feelings and the same feeling can be triggered by many different situations.

Jen is now a bubbly artist and mum of three, but previously she found herself in a relationship, which over many years wore her down, she felt out of control, her self-worth was at an all-time low. Believing the daily newsfeed, she was hearing from her partner, about her inadequacies, lack of ability etc, she felt a shadow of her former bubbly self. When her partner was sent overseas on a short contract that didn’t include her, life threw her some space to think. She found that she had fallen into a state of dependency, incapable of making decisions, not sleeping, and feeling more than a little fed-up. When she was on her own for just a few days she realised she had become isolated from her support network and wasn’t painting any more. When the newsfeed was no longer broadcasting day and night she began to feel free to explore the things she used to do: throw paint on a canvas and see what picture emerged, laze-away an afternoon reading a book, treat herself to a long walk on the beach, eating a 99 dripping with chocolate sauce …and it felt good!

Jen took back control, rebuilt her circle of friends, left her partner and within months met the man she is still with, who loves her for who she is. She needed to let go, to allow space for other wonderful people and things waiting in the wings to make their entrance into her life.

Dan is a young executive in a fast-growing company where employees are expected to work over and above their contracted hours. He came home regularly after the kids had gone to bed, was never off his phone even when on holiday.

COVID19 didn’t change the expectations just the location. Last March Dan found himself working from home among enchanted fairy garden craft creations, Super Mario Lego builds and the odd dinosaur that would arrive on his desk to keep him ‘company’! He was frustrated by the chaos, stressing about not being able to deliver the workload and wasn’t sleeping, arguing more with his partner and short tempered with the kids. In a word his life was spiralling out of control when his daughter’s innocent comment hit him like a rocket!

Dan was on the phone to a client when his little girl ran in giggling and sprayed his head with multicoloured streamers! He had seconds to decide what to do so excusing himself from the meeting, he hit mute, picked her up and plonked her in the playroom and was going to give her the ‘don’t do things like that when daddy is trying to work lecture… when she put her hands around his neck and said – I love having you home during the day daddy even if you are grumpy and don’t have any playtime. That little gem of honesty stopped him in his tracks, and he got a flash of how he must appear to his daughter. Dan is now in the throes of sorting his priorities, and I do know that he has added some play time into the day, even though it’s scheduled, lol!

Personally, I know what it’s like to be in an emotional turmoil, caused by being in the wrong job. I felt disconnected, inadequate, lost, and exhausted as I tried to make way when there was no clear path. What I found was that when I took time to step back and look at all the incongruities that were around me, I found I was trying to do a job, I wasn’t trained for and instead of developing me it was destroying me. Try as I may I was knocked back three steps for every tentative step forward. Life offered me a solution; I was let go at the end of the contract! What did I do? Well, I went back to what I knew, while I regrouped.

I went through an Emotional Detox programme under the supervision of Roy Stephens and let go the debilitating feelings that were fuelling my low self-esteem. I stopped beating myself up and saw that I had transitioned through a period of growth, painful though it had been. This allowed me to dust myself down and take on a new job ready to make my mark as the real me. I have never looked back!

This month’s challenge is to use the lockdown to a positive end by doing the things that make you feel good. Throw paint on a canvas; gather a group of friends on-line and have a ‘bake-off’, you can put the competing teams in breakout rooms, with one of you keeping an overall eye. Set up a man-shed half hour and see what tools and gadgets you can share after lock-down or start a joint project. The options are endless.

AND, how about taking up the December offer of an Emotional Detox? This is a content-free session, so you don’t need to discuss anything, just be prepared to let go. Book your session here or call today on +44 (0)1691 887 062

Merry Christmas one and all.

Louise and all at The BeWell Foundation

The Colour of Change

Welcome to the first of our autumn blogs focusing on change.

Many of us have had to contend with changes this year and despite all that has been going on in the world, nature, yet again has maintained its natural cycle of change.

Every autumn I marvel at the trees, who celebrate the loss of their leaves with splashes of vibrant colour, not only changing the complexion of their leaves but also the ground around them, the streets, and woodland paths as if sharing the colour cloak of this magical time.

They are heralding the arrival of their well-earned rest during the winter months, in preparation for their awakening in spring, when growth of new leaves will create nesting environments for birds and shade for humans. They do not appear to be mourning a loss!

At the Foundation our orchard’s crop is abundant; apples and damsons go through their change to become chutney and jam, filling the larder with yummy homemade preserves that will become part of the meal time spread that everyone enjoys so much when working here with Roy.

So how can we use natures seamless acceptance of change and learn from it?

Change is inevitable. Development and growth will not happen without the contribution of change. Whether in relationships, jobs, thoughts and or feelings, I am sure you will agree that if we stayed in the mind-frame of when we were a child, life may present some interesting feedback!

Home working, blended working, the wearing of masks, the reduction of touch in the world is a lot of change at one go for all of us to content with.

If the trees didn’t adapt a strategy to manage the changing season and accept dormancy in winter, they would freeze and die. I am no expert but I was amazed when I read, that if water inside the tree’s cells freeze, it can mean death, but trees have processes to handle this situation; a form of natural antifreeze that kicks-in. What do we have?

It is at these heightened times of enforced change that pressing the hold button to review what we can change, will make the difference in the quality of our lives during the next few months.

I will hand you over to Roy for this month’s chat on changing behaviour.

Stay warm and well xx

Lou

Roy talks about change

Our First ‘introduction to change’ day

In just over a year we have gone from demolishing the old, to building the new, to now being in a position to open this beautiful Centre. We are so pleased with the finished space.

On Saturday the 22^nd I was preparing the Dawn room to welcome our first group on Sunday 23^rd of August when there was an urgent shout for help from the bathroom. I was met with a steady flow of water heading towards me…having been in situ for nearly two months the loo had decided to over flow !

To cut a damp story short, Big Al and Roy came to the rescue and spent nearly 6 hours of their Saturday afternoon locating the blockage and getting us ship shape again. Despite eventually having to remove the toilet they remained calm and jovial throughout. Definitely the men to have around in a crisis 😊

Sunday dawned and our merry group of five arrived at 09:30 am. COVID checks done the group settled into their comfy floor seats, with some trepidation of what was to come.

Rather than me babbling-on about what transpired, I am handing over to some of the participants to tell you what they thought…

“I recently attended ‘an introduction to change’ day and it was an enlightening experience. The view from treatment facility is absolutely stunning and it felt like a retreat from the moment I arrived. Roy and Louise are inspiring and have created safe and relaxing environment which promotes healing and self-discovery.We were treated to an introduction to many techniques including, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), Hypnosis, Reiki, Auricular Therapy and more. Each one offered something different but they complemented each other perfectly.I left feeling completely transformed. If you are thinking of visiting Roy and Louise for treatment, don’t hesitate. I have no doubt it will be the best decision you’ve made in a long time.” (Emma G)

What an amazing beautiful space with stunning views. The introduction to change day – I really recommend this. What a fabulous day – Lou is an amazing and fabulous Reiki practitioner. Roy, I could listen to for hours and was inspirational. I have introduced some of the practices he shared to calm my busy mind. I am looking forward to much more from this beautiful and enriching space – thank you ( Margo McC)

What a very special day! I felt like I was on a journey, exploring and nurturing parts of myself in a safe and warm environment. Louise and Roy were as warm and welcoming as ever, the centre they have created is wonderful and I learnt so much over the day. I’m looking forward to returning to try in more depth some of the techniques we were introduced to (Anna L)

**All ears while Roy explains Auricular Acupuncture**

**Intro to Reiki by Louise before demo**

**Margo talks while Maja listens in *Time to Think* Session**

Cracking end to the day!

Think everyone got the point at the end of the day!

We would like to thank everyone for their open participation on the day. The centre is still resonating from the energy created. Next Introduction to Change Day will be 20^th September The event is posted on facebook and as numbers are limited to 6 early booking is advised. Remember, you are not what you think you are – you are everything you may become, Roy ”

Stay well Louise

Walking with intention

This month’s topic is on how to change your day by doing things with intention.

Welcome to The BeWell Foundation’s monthly catch up. We hope you are well and looking after yourselves.

Some of you will be getting ready to go back to work, while others continue to work from home which as we know can be a mixed blessing. Like all things this time will pass and we are conscious that we may look back and see lost opportunities or be surprised at our resilience to adapt and change.

At the BeWell Foundation preparation continues and the hard work put into planning the groundwork by Big Al and his team is showing results. The design of the outside space was a collaborative venture by a group who understood the atmosphere we were looking to create. The resulting outdoor living and working space is a credit to all. There are still things to do but like everyone else we are dependent on suppliers being open. The grass will grow I have no doubt and the resident tiger will be happier!

By the way I’d like to introduce you to our new neighbours who are indeed a rare breed!

A about a month ago I went for a walk up the road. Having often walked this stretch of the road before I had gone out that morning with the intention of being totally in the moment, not an easy task when there was so much to think about. I came back astonished that I had spotted a lilac tree and opposite it a laburnum tree for the first time. They of course had been there for years, but the surroundings had become so familiar they had blended into the hedgerow and become invisible, that is until I decided to walk the road with intent and hey-presto things previously hidden were revealed.

I set myself a task for the following windy morning, to notice what I noticed when walking again with intent. I came back with a wild observation that the wind in the trees sounded different depending on the species of tree. The wind in the Oak, Ash, Pine and Hazel all sounded different; there were tone and volume differences as if the tree were having a conversation and the wind was their breath. How cool is that!

So, you might be asking how does this little ditty correlate to personal change? Well if you are going to make changes in your life you might want to stop and be in the moment in the life you have. Are there wonderful things hidden in the familiarity of your home, family or your day? When your partner talks to you are you really listening or busy doing something else? When your kids rattle of a list of things they are doing or want to do, are you nodding you head but thinking about what’s for dinner or the next job on the never-ending list of things that need to be done?

You won’t be alone if you answer yes to one or all of the above. Our lives have become so busy that the simple courtesy of active listening to someone can diminished in proportion to how well we know them as we thinking we know what they are going to say before they say it. Even our nearest and dearest can become so familiar we don’t really see them anymore.

The task for this month is to turn to the person who is talking to you and give them your full attention. Be in the moment with that person and even if you are in a shop when you are desperate to just pay and get on to the next thing, be in the moment and notice, noticing, what you notice. Jot some observations in your journal or better still drop us a comment on Facebook, we’d love to hear from you.

This month’s gem of wisdom –

“You’d be surprised how many people violate this simple principle every day of their lives and try to fit square pegs into round holes, ignoring the clear reality that Things Are As They Are.” Benjamin Hoff, The Tao of Pooh

Catch you next time when we will be talking about ‘the therapeutic benefits of weeding’!

Be Well

Louise

A Welcome note

We are nearly ready to open the doors to our guests and we are very excited about it.

Welcome to The Bewell Foundation’s monthly catch up. We hope you are well and looking after yourselves.

This is a strange time and many of us are getting used to new ways of working, socialising and even doing the shopping, I certainly am!

At the Bewell foundation its been a busy time putting the finishing touches to our new treatment and seminar centre to make it safe for you to join us away from the hustle bustle of everyday life. Our groups are limited to 4 to 5 people so no issue maintaining social distancing and as soon as we get the go ahead our on-site accommodation will reopen. Its been a busy time for our woolly neighbours too!

Roy and I were sitting on the hill having a coffee the other day, chatting about the build and how the process was a fantastic metaphor for our change programme. We’ve kept some of the robust structure of the old building, namely the gable end and the side of the building that hosted the two stable doors, a feature of the old barn we both loved. Other parts were demolished as they couldn’t support the new design. Some features were salvaged as whilst not perfect, with a little attention and remodelling we could retain their character without compromising on safety.

The connection for you is when you make changes in your life you keep the good elements from your current situation, remodel something and at times completely revamp other things. At the Bewell Foundation we show you how to build on the good things, demolish ‘stuff’ that is holding you back, so you can look, feel and be your new build.

As with many conversations it moved on to the best quality we thought the build had highlighted and we decided it was the tenacity we showed during the wet cold months of autumn and winter when we thought the rain would never stop, our hands would never be warm again and the endless questions from contractors and tradesmen would never end.

However during this period we stayed focused on our end goal, kept our vision big so as not to lose sight of why we were standing out in the rain, freezing our hands off laying cables in the snow, while a bitterly cold wind ripped at our faces. We realised that sometimes you have to have a little pain to give birth to a wonderful creation.

We all have things in our lives that are supportive, experiences that enrich our existence and people without whom life would just not be the same.

I challenge you to start a journal, and this month’s entry is about acknowledge the people that impact positively on your life. When did you last make the time to tell them they are important?

What are your passions? What makes you smile? These don’t need to be big things, sometimes it’s the small things in life that make the difference. Drop us a line and share your thoughts, we’d love to hear from you.

I leave you with this month’s word of wisdom. Do you really want to be happy? You can begin by being appreciative of who you are and what you’ve got.” Benjamin Hoff, The Tao of Pooh

Catch you next time when we will be talking about ‘notice, noticing what you notice’!

Be Well,

Louise